Mumpreneurs in Tech Startups: Discrimination, Conflicting Priorities and Support Systems

The three key challenges that mothers founding tech startups face, and how to transform weakness into strength.

Peiru Teo remembers a fleeting conversation she had at a tech conference. Then visibly pregnant, the founder of AI healthcare automation software company KeyReply was asked by a senior male leader whether she was coming back to work.

It may be an offhand remark, but it echoed a deeper bias not just in the tech industry, but in the business world in general – that mothers or mothers-to-be are less committed to their career, even if they are founders of businesses that they had built from scratch. 

It is not an empowering stereotype, and Peiru chose not to dwell on the comment precisely for that reason. However, this is one of the many challenges that mumpreneurs face. 
This month, ConnectOne speaks to four mothers to address challenges head-on, and also find out how mumpreneurs have turned perceived weakness into strength.

#1 CONFRONTING MOTHERHOOD DISCRIMINATION

If you feel any bias, take it as a signal for low partner-founder fit and focus on engaging with others that believe in what you are doing

- Pachara (Pinn) Lawjindakul, partner at Lightspeed Venture Partners

Interestingly, many mothers launched their own business in the first place because of such biases at the workplace. In Sweden for instance, many mothers were driven to entrepreneurship because of discriminatory wage reduction in the corporate world, according to a Wharton study.

Liz Pruszko Steininger experienced this first hand when she found herself hitting a glass ceiling in her career. Though she had wanted to take a leadership role, the mother-of-one found herself unable to progress further. 

Quitting her job, she did some consulting work before starting her own company, network security company Least Authority. Her daughter was only two when she founded the business.

Ironically but unsurprisingly, even after leaving the corporate world, these motherhood biases persist. 

“The tech industry in general is built around a senior man. And depending on the person, motherhood can sometimes be seen as a disadvantage. People may think you are going to be distracted by your kid,” Liz noted.

In some cases, prejudices may even have an impact on funding. “I have heard stories of founder mums having to hide their pregnancy when raising funds for fear that they will be discriminated against. While most venture capitalists (VCs) may not have discriminatory intentions, the fact that this fear exists among founders sheds light on a broader societal mindset,” said Elena Chow, founder of ConnectOne.

Indeed, another mumpreneur Rhonda Wong, founder of online housing platform Ohmyhome shared with VulcanPost: “One of the biggest misconceptions is that (mumpreenurs) are unable to give 100 per cent of our time to the business. Back when I was expecting, we had to be cautious if our investors would view us as less able founders.”

Tip: Focus on finding the right partner fit

While Pachara (Pinn) Lawjindakul, partner at Lightspeed Venture Partners shared that she and her other VC peers do not take specific gender or role lens when investing, she suggested that mumpreneurs facing such issues should focus their energies on finding the right partner fit.

“If you feel any bias, take it as a signal for low partner-founder fit and focus on engaging with others that believe in what you are doing,” she said.

#2 MANAGING COMPETING PRIORITIES

“Balance does not have to be one-third sleep, one-third work and one-third family. Balance is what we define as important, and it is fluid and changes. There is a season for what balance looks like at each point. It can seem lopsided, and that is okay,”

- Peiru, Founder of Key Reply

Both tech entrepreneurship and motherhood, particularly in the early stages, are 24/7 roles, hence work-family conflicts are common. “There are some times of the year where you really need to put a lot into business development or have fires to put out. And regardless of the situation, the children will always need your attention and time,” shared Peiru.

“It all comes down to alignment of priorities, leveraging on help and time management. Because if we don't get that right, we will always feel like we are burning the candle on both sides and always feel bad whichever thing we are spending our time on,” she said.

Tip: Find balance

“Balance does not have to be one-third sleep, one-third work and one-third family. Balance is what we define as important, and it is fluid and changes. There is a season for what balance looks like at each point. It can seem lopsided, and that is okay,” Peiru said.

Liz also noted that entrepreneurs do not necessarily have to be over-committed to the business to succeed. “It is a total misconception that you don’t drop everything and make it your highest priority, you can't be successful. Even if you don’t do that, you can still have a sustainable company with happy clients,” she shared.

#3 STRUGGLING WITH THE LACK OF SUPPORT

I credit my partner for being extremely supportive and carrying his weight in parenting. 

- Liz Pruszko Steininger, CEO of Least Authority

Even though fathers today tend to be more hands-on, a key obstacle when it comes to women’s careers in general is the “deep-rooted attitudes that a woman should be the primary caregiver, so it is ‘understood’ that her career may have to take a backseat”, said a Harvard Business School alumna.

“With a kid, you have somebody dependent on both parents. If the other parent isn't supportive of you working long hours, having to have a flexible schedule, and jumping on a call at 10:30pm or in the middle of bath-time, it becomes a lot harder,” Liz said. She credited her partner for being extremely supportive of her career and carrying his weight in parenting. 

Peiru agreed that family support is key, not just for mumpreneurs but entrepreneurs in general. “I've seen families break apart because of the stresses of entrepreneurship, even if the founder is not a mum. Having our other halves understand the entrepreneurship journey is key,” she said.

She also noted that a supportive co-founder is extremely important. “Maybe you used to work till 12am every day, and now because of a kid, you work till 8pm or have time blocks that you are not available. Or maybe you used to be available round-the-clock and now you're not. I think these life changes need to be not just tolerated, but embraced as part of a new identity. Otherwise, there will be resentment,” she said.

She added that mothers should re-audit how they spend their time to make sure they are replacing quantity with quality time to be fair to their co-founders.

Tip: Create a support network

If you do not have a supportive life or business partner, find a tribe amongst other founders. Look for women-oriented groups that provide you with business and emotional support, or come together to create your own support group, so that you need not navigate the challenges of mumpreneurship alone.

EMBRACING MUMPRENEURSHIP

“The greatest rewards of mumpreneurship is being a role model to my nine-year-old daughter. “Everything that I do business-wise could fail tomorrow. But my daughter has learned the most important lesson: That she can be a leader, have a serious career, juggle multiple things in her life and still put her kids to bed if that’s what she wants”

- Liz

Despite the challenges, both Liz and Peiru shared that being a mother has given them an edge in their startup journey.

“There are times when I’m glad I learned how to deal with a two-year-old who doesn't want to get in the bath and negotiate with my four-year-old why she shouldn't run in front of cars, because this helps me better negotiate with adults in my business,” said Liz.

Motherhood can make founders more nurturing leaders as well. “Just like our children, our employees are people who have their own aspirations. Being a mother has helped me understand that everyone grows at their own pace and marches to their own beat.

“I always try to find what my kid does best and nurture him towards that direction rather than make him do what I think he should. This has also helped me view my team in a more constructive manner. Instead of trying to change people, I have more curiosity and try to look for areas to nurture to bring out everyone’s best,” Peiru said.

Liz also shared that one of the greatest rewards of mumpreneurship is being a role model to her nine-year-old daughter. “Everything that I do business-wise could fail tomorrow. But my daughter has learned the most important lesson: That she can be a leader, have a serious career, juggle multiple things in her life and still put her kids to bed if that’s what she wants,” she said.

Her advice to other mothers planning to start a business, or to entrepreneurs contemplating motherhood: If you want to have the kid and want the startup, do it. Don’t wait forever… especially when it comes to having kids,” she said, adding that women’s reproductive years are limited. 

“Have everything you want, just make sure you have the support and your priorities straight. You're going to have to make some tough decisions some days but you’ll figure it out,” she added.

Reflecting a similar sentiment, Pinn said, “The best founders don’t let labels get in their way. They just do what needs to be done as leaders of change.”